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For some inexplicable reason, the cicadas of America have declared war on lefties from U.S. President Joe Biden all the way down to anti-gun zealot David Hogg.
On Thursday, just a day after a swarm of cicadas reportedly clogged the engines of Air Force One, delaying the president’s overseas flight out of Washington, D.C., another lone but intrepid cicada in Florida set its eyes on Hogg.
In a tweet posted Friday afternoon, the 21-year-old far-left activist and anti-gun zealot explained that a cicada had landed on him Thursday — and that this unexpected landing had driven him into a fit of utter madness and rage.
A cicada landed on me yesterday and I threw my phone 10 feet – it landed screen down- on a staircase
I can not wait for this to be over
— David Hogg (@davidhogg111) June 11, 2021
My phone survived with a few scratches- as did the cicada
— David Hogg (@davidhogg111) June 11, 2021
As he explained, he wound up throwing his phone 10 feet. But he didn’t explain why he threw his phone. Did the cicada land on the phone? But didn’t he say it had landed “on me?” Regardless, the phone survived — as did the cicada.
What didn’t survive, sadly, was Hogg’s already ruinous reputation.
In response to his “whiny” tweet, his critics rushed to poke fun at his striking inability to handle not a bee sting or snake bite — but rather a simple cicada landing.
I guess this wouldn’t be you then…😏😆 pic.twitter.com/huCKNxKY9P
— Short-N-Snarky™ (@ssnarkismygame) June 11, 2021
— Gary Herstein, Ph.D. (@GaryLH57) June 11, 2021
You are older than the average soldier that landed at Normandy. The next time you are confronted by an insect, try to man up for once in your pathetic snowflake life. pic.twitter.com/bpD20oowNo
— TradeMax77 (@Max77Trade) June 12, 2021
Imagine the courage of men and women to take on ISIS who regularly beheaded people as Obama watched. Can you even change a tire, fella? A bug, a bug has beaten you, pathetic.
— #PrayForIsrael * *skp45 (@SharonP92453996) June 12, 2021
Totally normal and expected reaction for a soy-boy.
I’m so sorry that happened to you, thoughts and prayers.
— President* Bunter Hidin (@MikeStevens70) June 12, 2021
How to tell me you’re a little whiny beta boy without telling me you’re a whiny little beta boy.
Grow a pair.
— South Florida Dude (@firemannydiaz) June 12, 2021
That’s genuinely pathetic and I’m not saying to insult you. It literally is pathetic.
— Ghost Feet ن AKA Iron Lady (@Just_Here_4Food) June 12, 2021
Some also took issue with his claim that he’d flung his phone 10 feet. That’s a fairly impressive distance for a young man who looks to weigh so little. As far as the critics were concerned, this was “fake news.”
Implying you have the upper body strength to throw a cellphone 10 feet. I’m tired of those fake news peddlers.
— Wild Thought 🇰🇵🏳️🌈 (@WildThought7) June 12, 2021
@davidhogg111 cant throw a phone that far
— Abstrakqt Thot (@Abstrakqt_Thot) June 12, 2021
That you claim you could throw ANYTHING 10 feet with those pencil-like guns is laughable.
— Randy Ryder (@NHSparky) June 12, 2021
I’m having trouble believing you could throw anything ten feet @davidhogg111 with arms like yours.
— Dierre Pelecto (@MisterZeeeee) June 12, 2021
There’s no way you mustered the strength to throw a phone that far.
— Jeff (@DrJeff79) June 12, 2021
Some even jokingly suggested that perhaps Hogg got the story backward and that, in reality, the cicada had thrown him 10 feet, not the other way around.
Ya sure the cicada didn’t throw you as well???
— fedo (@fedo13065341) June 12, 2021
The cicada could probably throw him 10feet
— LJ (@LyleJohnston) June 12, 2021
The bad news for Hogg is that, so long as he remains in Florida, cicadas will forever remain a part of his life.
“Florida’s cicadas emerge year after year and so are considered ‘annual’ species. They come out of the ground in the last of their many nymph forms to make a dramatic escape from a clear exoskeleton, which is abandoned as an alien-looking statuette. Then, on freshly unfurled wings, the bugs fly off to hang out high in trees,” according to the Orlando Sentinel.
These cicadas differ from the “periodical” cicadas that have been hitting East Coast states such as North Carolina and Connecticut. Though they’ve emerged in exceptionally high numbers, they only emerge every 13 or 17 years.
Hogg has made headlines several times in the past few months.
Last month he said he believes the path to becoming a billionaire doesn’t involve any hard work.
In tweets, he used so-called “math” to prove that billionaires didn’t earn their wealth “by working hard and lifting [themselves] up by the bootstraps.”
To hear him tell it, billionaires earn their wealth via “ridiculously undertaxed compound interest and tax breaks for Wallstreet and not main street at the cost of your workers.”
The tweets predictably triggered mockery.
— Conservative News (@BIZPACReview) May 2, 2021
A month earlier, he became a national laughing stock when he suddenly resigned from, and thus gave up on, the pillow company he’d launched only two months earlier.
What made the resignation so hilarious, critics argued, was that he’d been so arrogantly confident that he was going to change the world and prove a point by launching a pillow company.
David Hogg learns life is hard, quits ‘very real’ pillow fight with My Pillow before first batch rolls off line https://t.co/sMXjdgoyug
— Bo Snerdley (@BoSnerdley) April 12, 2021
Ultimately, he did prove a point. It just wasn’t the one he’d sought to prove …
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