‘That’s genuinely pathetic’: David Hogg’s cicada run-in earns vicious Twitter mockery

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For some inexplicable reason, the cicadas of America have declared war on lefties from U.S. President Joe Biden all the way down to anti-gun zealot David Hogg.

On Thursday, just a day after a swarm of cicadas reportedly clogged the engines of Air Force One, delaying the president’s overseas flight out of Washington, D.C., another lone but intrepid cicada in Florida set its eyes on Hogg.

In a tweet posted Friday afternoon, the 21-year-old far-left activist and anti-gun zealot explained that a cicada had landed on him Thursday — and that this unexpected landing had driven him into a fit of utter madness and rage.


As he explained, he wound up throwing his phone 10 feet. But he didn’t explain why he threw his phone. Did the cicada land on the phone? But didn’t he say it had landed “on me?” Regardless, the phone survived — as did the cicada.

What didn’t survive, sadly, was Hogg’s already ruinous reputation.

In response to his “whiny” tweet, his critics rushed to poke fun at his striking inability to handle not a bee sting or snake bite — but rather a simple cicada landing.


Some also took issue with his claim that he’d flung his phone 10 feet. That’s a fairly impressive distance for a young man who looks to weigh so little. As far as the critics were concerned, this was “fake news.”


Some even jokingly suggested that perhaps Hogg got the story backward and that, in reality, the cicada had thrown him 10 feet, not the other way around.


The bad news for Hogg is that, so long as he remains in Florida, cicadas will forever remain a part of his life.

“Florida’s cicadas emerge year after year and so are considered ‘annual’ species. They come out of the ground in the last of their many nymph forms to make a dramatic escape from a clear exoskeleton, which is abandoned as an alien-looking statuette. Then, on freshly unfurled wings, the bugs fly off to hang out high in trees,” according to the Orlando Sentinel.

These cicadas differ from the “periodical” cicadas that have been hitting East Coast states such as North Carolina and Connecticut. Though they’ve emerged in exceptionally high numbers, they only emerge every 13 or 17 years.

Hogg has made headlines several times in the past few months.

Last month he said he believes the path to becoming a billionaire doesn’t involve any hard work.

In tweets, he used so-called “math” to prove that billionaires didn’t earn their wealth “by working hard and lifting [themselves] up by the bootstraps.”

To hear him tell it, billionaires earn their wealth via “ridiculously undertaxed compound interest and tax breaks for Wallstreet and not main street at the cost of your workers.”

The tweets predictably triggered mockery.

A month earlier, he became a national laughing stock when he suddenly resigned from, and thus gave up on, the pillow company he’d launched only two months earlier.

What made the resignation so hilarious, critics argued, was that he’d been so arrogantly confident that he was going to change the world and prove a point by launching a pillow company.

Ultimately, he did prove a point. It just wasn’t the one he’d sought to prove …


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