Actress Valerie Bertinelli lashed out with an emotional, tearful, and angry response via video to a troll who lectured her online that she needed to lose weight, telling the insensitive person that she has no idea what she’s going through.
The heart-wrenching reaction from the Food Network host who is now 61 was shared on Instagram Thursday evening. Bertinelli admitted she made the “mistake” of reading comments posted concerning some of her recipes and tripped across the mean-spirited message while doing so.
“Because see, I don’t have a scale or I don’t have clothes that I’m trying to put on every day, and I don’t have mirrors so I don’t see what’s become of me,” she sarcastically stated, trying to contain her hurt and hold back the tears. “So I needed that help to let me know that I need to lose weight.”
“You’re not being helpful,” she remarked. “Because when you see somebody who has put some weight on, my first thought is, ‘That person is obviously going through some things.’”
(Video Credit: Access)
Like so many who battle with weight problems, Bertinelli stated that if she could “lose the weight and keep it off,” she would.
“But since I haven’t been successful with that my whole entire life — at 61, I’m still dealing with [it]. You think I’m not tired of it, lady?” she angrily asked the commenter. “Where’s the compassion? Not f**king helpful!”
In the caption to the post, Bertinelli asked, “Aren’t we tired of body shaming women yet?!”
She considered deleting the emotional outpouring on the video that initially appeared on her Instagram Story, but eventually decided to leave it up after a number of people offered support and praised her for her honesty.
“I was going to delete my stories because it’s a little embarrassing and scary to be so vulnerable. But then I realized it was hitting it a ‘good’ nerve with so many of you who were so sweet to dm and share your same vulnerability and struggles,” she wrote on Instagram. “We all could use a little more kindness and patience and grace, because we just never know what someone else is going through. So here it is. Not deleting. Owning it.”
Bertinelli came to fame on the 1970s sitcom “One Day at a Time.” She has never tried to hide her struggle with weight issues during her acting career and wrote an op-ed for “Today” last year where she admitted that she “used food to avoid sadness.”
“With the loss of my parents and dealing with other trials life throws our way, I’ve used food as a way not to feel the sadness or the stress,” she wrote. “But by eating something away, all it does is make me feel worse about myself. One of my personal mottos is ‘choose happy.’ But sometimes that choice is really challenging.”
The past year has been a rough one for the actress. She lost her ex-husband, rocker Eddie Van Halen, to throat cancer at the age of 65 in 2020. He had fought the disease for many years but finally succumbed to it. They were married for 26 years, from 1981 to 2007, before divorcing, and have a son named Wolfgang who is 30-years-old and also a musician.
Her son commented on her post, “you’re perfect the way you are, Ma. I love you. (also for no particular reason, what was that f**kers @ so I can harass them with memes?)”
Singer Demi Lovato showed her support, writing, “I love you. You said it yourself, you’re already enough AND whoever said that is hurting.. or not being shown enough compassion in their lives. I’m sorry you had to deal w this. Here for you always.”
Actress Haylie Duff also gave Bertinelli some heartfelt advice. “You are gorgeous and glorious! An inspiration to women everywhere block that hater,” she suggested.
“I’ve been on the receiving end of comments like these so many times. Hell, half my life! It f—ing hurts,” musician Michelle Branch wrote. “Thank you for being vulnerable and authentic and always leading with such heart.”
“And I have come to the conclusion that people who make these kind of mean comments that lack compassion are the ones that probably need compassion the most because they are broken and unhappy. And that is a horrible way to exist,” actress Melissa Peterman said. “I love you.”
“I feel like cursing, but I won’t…publicly,” fellow Food Network star Sunny Anderson stated. “Just know your insides count, everyone… your INSIDES.”
“There’s so much kindness out there,” Bertinelli said in a video Friday night on Instagram.
“I certainly do not feel so alone anymore. It’s the shame part that’s really hard to get rid of, that stupid emotion that is absolutely useless. But I just wanted to say thank you,” she commented. “Let’s have a really f**king great day today, you guys!”
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The actress found a lot of support on Twitter:
I support Valerie Bertinelli in whatever she does or whatever she weighs. Any woman who would attack her weight is probably in the self esteem crapper herself. Ignore them after you block them but tell them piss off first Valerie.
— Stella Parton (@StellaParton) July 9, 2021
That video from Valerie Bertinelli is freaking amazing. Brava her. Also, every time you fat-shame someone, it blows back onto people who aren't celebrities, sends teens into cycles of binge eating and purging, and feels like a big slap in the face to folks already struggling.
— Victoria Brownworth (@VABVOX) July 9, 2021
i hope everyone BESIDES the person that made valerie bertinelli cry has a great day!! <3
— ˗ˏˋ gabby ˎˊ˗ (@lazulists) July 8, 2021
Who could be mean to someone as sweet, pretty and positive as Valerie Bertinelli? She’s a lovely human.
— Heeeere’sBuddy! (@CrankyMaryB) July 9, 2021
What’s wrong with people? Does it make them feel better to put others down? Valerie Bertinelli is beautiful, she’s kind and sweet and loves her family. Let’s make ourselves better people before passing judgement
— PurplePassion (@PurpleP73448598) July 10, 2021
There is no more compassionate and amazing person than Valerie Bertinelli, I have always had a crush on Valerie the first time I saw her on “ One day at a time “
— David Yoffee (@DYoffee) July 9, 2021
We are all battling something. Stay strong.
— Sidecar53 (@sidecar53) July 10, 2021
I am the same age as you & have the exact same history of yo-yo dieting. It is what it is but of course I’m not a public figure. But, I can totally relate to the hurt that you are experiencing & all I can say is you are beautiful inside and out. Just stay healthy and be yourself!
— Ellen (@Ellen52253706) July 9, 2021