Fox News host Greg Gutfeld shared a hilarious video about the not-so-funny events in Afghanistan because sometimes things are so disastrously bad that you have to laugh to maintain some sense of sanity.
With the Taliban now firmly in control of Afghanistan after routing the established Afghan government in a matter of days, stranding 10,000 or more Americans in the capital city of Kabul, and President Joe Biden emitting weakness from the White House, events are about as bad as can be imagined.
And that’s where Gutfeld the comedian comes into play.
“Meet the new & improved Taliban 2.0,” he tweeted, sharing a well-produced video that sells the Taliban like an item being plugged on late-night TV.
“We’re getting the TaliBAN back together,” the video begins. “Introducing Taliban 2.0. It’s been two decades. We’ve grown and we beheading in the right direction. This ain’t your grandfather’s terror network, we killed your grandfather years ago. Sure, we still think women are inferior, and we still hate Jews, gays and Christians, Hindus, foreigners, and the Mets.”
“But now we use the right pronouns before we kill,” the narrator continued. “And our local offices are always open to hear from dissenters, and we promise to never go door to door looking for you.”
— Gutfeld! (@Gutfeldfox) August 20, 2021
Viewers are urged to follow the Taliban on Twitter and to subscribe to their YouTube page, as the narrator reassured them they are not censored “because we don’t criticize elections.”
“And don’t forget to smash that ‘Like’ button like the head of an infidel,” he cheerfully reminds all.
A “kinder, gentler” Taliban have been pushing a public relations campaign this week that women’s rights will be respected. In addition to saying they will honor women’s rights, they encouraged girls to return to school and even urged women to join the government.
On the same day this propaganda was being uttered, Taliban fighters reportedly shot and killed a woman in Takhar province after she went out in public without a burqa — the Taliban have said women will have to wear hijabs but not burkas.
Taliban spokesman Zabihullah Mujahid said the militant group is “committed to the rights of women under the system of sharia law,” but stressed women would work and study “within our frameworks.” Now that’s one helluva caveat.
As for the claim that they are not going door to door, it is now being reported that the Taliban has a list of people who helped U.S. forces and are indeed going door-to-door searching for them and then brutally hanging those that they find.
Lt. Colonel Oliver North appeared on Fox News’ “Hannity” on Thursday night and broke some disturbing news.
“They’ve got the bank records. They got it all thanks to the embassy… It is being reported that the Taliban has captured the payroll data from the American embassy and the Kabul banks showing the names, addresses, and phone numbers for locals now being hunted down.”
There was also a report of two men being paraded through an Afghanistan street with their faces tarred black and nooses around their necks.
“Taliban accused these men of theft, their faces were colored with black color — to embarrass them,” Afghanistan journalist Bilal Sarwary tweeted.
As for a “new and improved” Taliban, social media users couldn’t help but notice all those nice U.S. assets at their disposal — courtesy of the U.S. military under Biden’s direction, leaving behind millions of dollars of arms and equipment, not to mention millions more abandoned by the Afghan army.
Here’s a quick sampling of some of those responses from Twitter:
Their weapons all seem to be new and improved 👍
— Brad Crockett (@pizzapimp812) August 20, 2021
:58 second mark. Nice $1500 IR Optic on that M4. Have to imagine that Biden also gave the Taliban the NVGs needed to use it effectively.
— DWRinATX (@DWRinATX) August 20, 2021
All those USA weapons and rolling assets makes me wonder what big bangy things they may have now hmmmm?
— XRPHILIP (@AdorianPhilip) August 20, 2021
They all have guns made in the USA. we should be proud of all the support #SaigonJoe is giving them.
— Walter (@DogWoodOne) August 20, 2021
— Cyclepath (@FalTennis) August 20, 2021
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