On Mother’s Day, woman pours her heart out over dark side of the holiday no one stops to think about

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Mother’s Day is celebrated around the world and is the second most popular holiday for gift-giving, after Christmas.

But for women struggling with fertility issues, the day can be a painful reminder of their frustrations.

In a column published recently by Redbook magazine, freelance writer Alice Knisley Matthias detailed some of those frustrations.

Titled “Dear World, Please Stop Throwing Mother’s Day In My Face,” the mother of two boys writes about her own efforts and an experience she once had on Mother’s Day.

“We spent a lot of time and money doing rounds of fertility treatments in the quest for parenthood,” she wrote. “Working with a fertility clinic can feel like a part-time job.”

And while some women experience success, others do not.

“If you’re one of the lucky ones who achieve success early on you can put a stop to the rounds of treatment,” Matthias said. “But if you’re one of the patients who begins at the starting line again, month after month, it can start to take a toll.”

She wrote about the “intense emotions” involved in the process, as well as the financial strains, stressing that there is no guarantee of success.

Matthias then shared an incident that occurred on Mother’s Day that was particularly stinging.

Noting that she took care to stay away from restaurants and other places to avoid watching everyone celebrate, Matthias said she stopped in at a drug store to pick up a few things and when the young man finished ringing her up, he said the one thing she didn’t want to hear — “Have a Happy Mother’s Day!”

“Poor kid. He had no idea of knowing the Pandora’s box he just opened,” she said, before recounting what happened next:

“What makes you think I’m a mother?” I asked.

Nothing I was buying would indicate there were kids at home. No diapers. No baby wipes. My basket had items like shampoo, dog food, toothpaste and paper towels.

“Oh, aren’t you?” he said. “I’m sorry. I just assumed you were,” he said.

“No, I’m not,” I said. “Just be careful with wishing a woman a Happy Mother’s Day. It’s not always the greatest day for every woman.”

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Tom Tillison

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