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Dave Scott: Water down the stew, here come the royals

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Op-ed views and opinions expressed are solely those of the author.

I never understood the appeal of the Duke and Duchess of Windsor.

As a kid growing up in Canada listening to radio accounts of their visits to North America I’d overhear my mother, grandmother and aunts talking about the couple in glowing terms. I never heard anybody mention what the pair did for a living. As far as I could tell they were unemployed and traveled endlessly, crashing on the coaches of friends in the United States and the sunny parts of Europe.

I wondered how being unemployed and sponging off friends and acquaintances could generate such adulation and generous hospitality. The pair turned up on yachts, in the White House, palatial mansions, etc. and never did a lick of work.

Did they offer to wash the dishes, mow the lawn, or buy groceries for their friends? Did they cook a meal or take their hosts to dinner? And where did they live when not occupying a spare bedroom somewhere?

As I grew older I learned that the Duke, an affable English fellow, once had a job for almost a year in 1936 but quit in a huff.  He then married his oddly named American girlfriend, Wallis, and the two spent the rest of their lives hanging out with their pals.

Prior to marrying Ms. Simpson, the Duke was employed as King of England, the name on the office door said “Edward VIII”. Kinging didn’t agree with Ed and his family didn’t like his girlfriend, so he told them to take the king job and shove it. Besides things were getting ugly with Germany so he decided it was time to skedaddle. On his way out the door he tossed the crown to his brother Albert, who assumed the job under the alias “King George”.

As much as the media and my relatives gushed over these two lay-abouts I never understood it. They reminded me of mooching Cousin Eddie and his wife, Catherine, in the Chevy Chase film, “Christmas Vacation”, except Cousin Eddie had some redeeming qualities.

It appears that laziness and feeling entitled run in the Windsor family. Another English royal and his American wife – Prince Harry and Meghan Markle –  the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, have picked up where Uncle Eddie and Aunt Wallis left off.

Like Aunt Wallis, Harry’s family didn’t much care for his new wife, Meghan. She reciprocated the dislike. Meghan convinced Harry to skedaddle, vacate the drafty palace and head to California, firing verbal assaults over their royal shoulders as they headed for the exit.

Prince Harry’s elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top and the show is run by wife Meghan. She declared when leaving the kingdom that she would like to take the royal china and silverware, keep a palace to hangout in, as well as a hefty annual sum of cash for Harry.

Grandma Elizabeth, who happens to be queen, was having none of it and suggested they hit the bricks pronto before she had them both tossed into the Tower of London. Don’t mess with a 95-year-old who’s been in the queen business for almost 70 years while continuously dealing with a notoriously dysfunctional family.

The Harry and Meghan duo now live in the U.S. where they do bupkis except whine. Harry has accused his royal family of “institutional racism” and called the First Amendment of the U.S Constitution “bonkers.” Apparently the two freeloaders have identified as Democrats. They don’t work, hate the United States and the U.S. Constitutional system, and want others to pay their bills.

I agree with a recent decision by an environmental group, Population Matters, that announced it is presenting an award to the couple for their decision to limit their family to two children. It’s best to have as little evidence of their existence left behind as possible.

Dave Scott

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