‘Hold my Bud Light’: NY Times critic says ‘desperate’ Little Mermaid lacks joy, fun… and ‘kink’

Disney’s live-action remake of “The Little Mermaid” is a dud, according to one woke critic.

It’s “everything nobody should want in a movie,” wrote Wesley Morris for The New York Times, “dutiful and defensive, yet desperate for approval. It reeks of obligation and noble intentions.”

What the film, starring singer Halle Bailey, needed, according to Morris, is more “kink.”

“Joy, fun, mystery, risk, flavor, kink — they’re missing,” he stated.

(Video: YouTube)

Ummmm… what?

On Twitter, that third line rang out like the screeching brakes of a locked-up semi.

“I’m sorry,” replied one user to The Times. “Did you say kink?”

It was a burning question many shared.

“The movie is saying, ‘We tried!'” Morris’s opening paragraph continued, as though he hadn’t just said that the children’s film wasn’t kinky enough for his liking. “Tried not to offend, appall, challenge, imagine. A crab croons, a gull raps, a sea witch swells to Stay Puft proportions: This is not supposed to be a serious event. But it feels made in anticipation of being taken too seriously. Now, you can’t even laugh at it.”

You can’t just throw something like that out there and then move on, as Morris and The New York Times discovered. A comment like that is something no one is able to “laugh at.”

“I’m inclined to agree with the quoted opening, and note that none of those things can exist when progressive dogma – woke – is the goal,” one user said. “But did that person write KINK?!?”

“Kink…and we wonder why people ask questions about you lot…” another user remarked.

“Kink, you say?” asked another. “Were you aware that this movie was made for kids?”

“‘Kink,'” another quoted, adding an “OK GROOMER” gif.

It’s almost as though The Times wants to get boycotted.

“NYT staffer: ‘Hey I bet you can’t write a horrible review on the new Little Mermaid and still get the right mad at you,'” quipped one user. “NYT critic: Hold my bellini.”

“Hold my Bud Light,” replied another user, “but same energy.”

For many, Morris’s critique was proof that the world has lost its collective marbles.

“He wrote KINK…..seriously, a children’s show that doesn’t have any kink….well that’s disappointing said no sane person ever,” one user wrote. “The world is a cesspool!”

“The world’s gone mad,” stated another.

“What planet are we on anymore?” asked a third. “Horrific.”


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