Tucker reacts to Biden speech follies as only he can: ‘a series of symbolic sex acts’

To see the corrupt media fawning over President Joe Biden’s first address to Congress was as predictable as the rising sun. After all, this is their guy. The man they actively ran interference for while collectively undermining former President Donald Trump’s reelection efforts.

And while criticism of the media’s shameless behavior was common, leave it to Fox News host Tucker Carlson to wrap it up in a brilliant package, complete with a gaudy bow.

Heavy on sarcasm, Carlson on Thursday described the media reaction as “a series of symbolic sex acts” bestowed upon President Biden.

An example of this is a CBS News poll boldly declaring that “85% of viewers approve of President Biden’s speech to Congress.” To be clear, according to the major national network, only 3 out of every 20 people disapproved. The stunning claim even drew a “False” rating from left-leaning Snopes, which pointed out that those watching Biden were predominantly Democrats, a significant detail CBS mentioned in the report but failed to include in the graphics broadcast across social media.

“Language is designed to communicate ideas, but not when Joe Biden uses it,” Carlson said during the opening of “Tucker Carlson Tonight” on Thursday. “Last night’s speech was a cluster bomb of clichés meant to knock you senseless and make you surrender.”

(Video: Fox News)

“Americans choose hope over fear, Biden droned, truth over lies, light over darkness. We lost track after that, our brain shut down. Mission accomplished,” he continued. “The news media didn’t care, they didn’t even notice, they weren’t listening to him. They have no interest in what Joe Biden says. They got him elected — he’s their guy, and that is that.”

Considering that Biden is “technically” the president of the United States, Carlson posited, “the most powerful man in the world,” perhaps they should pay attention.

“But no, reporters cover Joe Biden like he is an actor on a press tour for the hot new summer blockbuster. He and his dazzling costar, Kamala,” the Fox News host said in jest.

Carlson ran clip after clip of shameless media figures profusely praising Biden, this being the very same cabal who spent four-plus years destroying his predecessor over every single word he uttered.

“Wait a second! Was that the President of the United States talking?” Carlson asked at the end of the montage, before proceeding with derision. “No, that’s what you thought. In fact, it was Jesus in aviator glasses. What Joe Biden said last night was beautiful, beautiful. It was intimate, grandfatherly. Indeed, Rooseveltian. Joe Biden spoke to the soul of America. He connected with people who don’t even deserve to be connected with. Hopeless sinners, redeemed by his voice alone. A voice that is not – and we want to be clear about this – the fading monotone of a 78-year-old man who is losing his grip. No, it’s not. Joe Biden’s voice modulates. It has the capacity to change pitch in a way that is – and we are quoting now – ‘rather extraordinary,’ and so on.”

“We could keep going with this if we wanted. Cable news is a rich vein, but we will stop and return to reality,” Carlson concluded. “A powerful politician gave a speech last night about how he plans to change your life, so we feel obligated to tell you what he said and not simply commit a series of symbolic sex acts upon him.”

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Tom Tillison

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