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‘CNN Uncovers Evidence Hero Dog Sniffed Dozens Of Butts Back In College’: Babylon Bee wins the internet

October 29, 2019 | | Print Article

The Babylon Bee took a satirical shot at CNN that had many thinking it resembled the network’s actual reporting.

The website known for its sense of irony and delivering news with a heavy dose of satire jabbed CNN in its coverage of the hero dog that President Trump said helped in “capturing and killing” ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi.

Trump tweeted a “declassified” photo of the dog on Monday, hailing the “wonderful” canine for his assistance in chasing Baghdadi through the tunnel in his Syrian compound where he was eventually cut off in a dead-end and died when he detonated a suicide vest.

Likely a Belgian Malinois, the hero dog’s name is still classified though it was revealed he was slightly injured in the mission, yet reportedly making a full recovery.

“We are not releasing the name of the dog right now,”  Gen. Mark A. Milley, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs, told reporters Monday. “We’re protecting his identity.”

“The dog is still in theater, returned to duty with its handler, so we’re not going to release just yet photos or names of dogs, or anything else,” he said, adding that “the military working dog performed a tremendous service as they all do in a variety of situations.”

While reports circulated about the K9’s important role in the mission, The Babylon Bee figured CNN’s take on the story would be markedly different.

In the “exclusive” report, CNN supposedly “searched through the dog’s internet history and college yearbooks” following the reports of the hero’s actions.

“Sure enough, CNN found a picture of the Hero Dog partying at obedience school. In the picture, the dog is seen sniffing a butt without consent,” the “report” continued. “Troubling reports from classmates indicate that the dog sniffed all these butts without consent. The dog wrote cryptic things in his college yearbook, apparently referring to different butt-sniffing maneuvers such as the Surprise Sniffarooski and the Canine’s Triangle.”

“Democrats immediately called for the dog to be court-martialed and for the death of Baghdadi to be overturned,” the piece concluded.

Readers used to The Bee’s brand of satire found the article hilarious and strangely similar to the reporting on Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh’s nomination hearings.

Some thought the piece could actually have been a real CNN report – or any other liberal media.

Many took to Twitter to show their appreciation.

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Frieda Powers
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