Elizabeth Warren rally goes off the rails when woman reads list of demands

Sen. Elizabeth Warren was temporarily upstaged by a woman with a list of demands at her New Hampshire rally.

The Massachusetts Senator and Democratic presidential candidate was entertained along with other attendees at the rally Thursday when a woman closed out the question-and-answer portion of the night with an often amusing list of suggestions.

(Video: YouTube)

Lucy Wells addressed Warren at the Newport event Thursday, just one day after the candidate’s Manchester headquarters office was broken into, according to The Associated Press.

Following the 2020 hopeful’s speech, the woman introduced herself and welcomed the senator to “the neighborhood.”

“I have a list that I made, and I will just give you the highlights. Pretend they’re questions,” she said as she began to read from her list which included innovative approaches to punishing child abusers and pharmaceutical executives, as well as calling for an end to “international piracy.”

“Some of them are the usual things, but I want to include respect for all religions,” Wells said, adding, “I want to place abusers of children on a melting slippery arctic iceberg while they await trial without internet.”

“That’s a good plan,” Warren quipped as the audience began to laugh.

“I want actual rehabilitation education skill building for the prison populations and keeping the incarcerated close to home,” she went on to audience applause as Warren responded with a “yes.”

“I want a minimum wage of $20 per hour and management training,” she said, drawing a surprised reaction from Warren who has called for a $15 minimum wage.

“Oh wow!” the Massachusetts lawmaker responded.

“I want an end to international piracy, drug trafficking, kidnapping, and modern slavery,” Wells continued. “My requests are modest.”

“Dream big!” Warren interjected.

“I want the pharma kingpins, I want them to run through a gauntlet in hospitals, nursing homes, senior citizen centers and children’s critical care units. A severe gauntlet,” she said. “I want, as you mention, reversals to cuts and compromises in scientific research, environmental protection and national parks.”

She drew applause again when she asked for “restoration of funding in public events for the arts.”

“I would be remiss if I did not mention that my soccer-playing grandchildren who are elementary school age, I want salaries for professional sportswomen to literally be on a level playing field,” Wells added.

“You bet,” Warren replied, laughing.

Wells was far from finished, however, as she still needed to address the apparently pressing issue of artesian wells.

“Internationally please, I would like equal rights for women. I would like respect for the languages and traditions of all peoples, and the more immigrants we have the more they are needed with their language skills, their multi-language skills,” she said to more applause.

“I want civility among us all. I want the oversight on reverse mortgages to eliminate the artesian well prohibition, deal-killing language, so rural homeowners can rightly be included,” she explained. “It’s way down in all the pages. Tiny tiny print. No artesian wells.”

Wells concluded her list with her monotone delivery, getting one more laugh from the audience.

“I want installation of loud screeching smoke alarms in the White House and legislative halls and campaign events to alert when pants or skirts are on fire,” she said. “Perhaps lastly I want teamwork and peace for our struggling earth. Thank you.”

“I love democracy!” Warren exclaimed as the audience applauded.

“Thank you Lucy, you have some wonderful, wonderful ideas here,” she said.

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Frieda Powers

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