It’s over, ladies and gentlemen. After months of frenzied speculation, intense debates and even a failed DNA test, Massachusetts Sen. Elizabeth Warren has finally confirmed that she is indeed a white woman. Shocking, is it not?
“I am not a person of color,”‘ the very surprisingly white 2020 contender boldly admitted Saturday to a shocked gallery of supporters in Iowa’s Sioux City.
Just kidding. Nobody was actually shocked.
“I am not a citizen of a tribe,” she continued. “Tribal citizenship is very different from ancestry. Tribes — and only tribes — determine tribal citizenship, and I respect that difference.”
She respects that difference so much that she spent a majority of her adult life falsely identifying as a Native American Indian so as to benefit politically and also benefit from affirmative action hiring programs intended for real Native Americans.
What a hero.
Listen to her below:
She said this after an audience member asked her why she released the results of a DNA test last year that proved that she’s not a real Native American Indian.
Warren argued that when she first ran for public office in 2012, Republicans allegedly “honed in on this part of my history” and began using “racial slurs” to mock her.
“So my decision was, I’m just going to put it all out there,” she said. “I can’t stop Donald Trump from what he’s going to do. I can’t stop him from hurling racial insults. But what I can do is I can be in this fight for all of our families.”
Warren believes that it was racist and evil for President Donald Trump and other Republicans to call her Pocahontas so as to mock her false claim of Native American ancestry.
Never mind that Debbie “White Dove” Porreco, an actual descendant of the real Pocahontas, has taken no offense to the mocking. Not only that, but she’s a fan of the president.
Learn more about her below:
“If Pocahontas were alive today, she’d be very proud of President Trump,” she said in a Sky News interview two years ago. “Just like Pocahontas was a heroine, Donald Trump is going to be our hero.”
She admitted during the interview that the president once asked her if his use of the term Pocahontas to mock Warren offended her.
“He said, ‘Does that offend you when I use that?’” Porreco recalled. “I told him no, it doesn’t offend me.”
But it does apparently offend Elizabeth Warren, who as a reminder is a white woman who spent the majority of her adult life pretending to be a Native American Indian, as noted by social media users:
“Yeah, I only used my tiny speck of vague heritage to get ahead at the university. What’s the big deal? Also, what’s the big deal about practicing law in MA without a license, anyway? I only did it for the money. Down with the rich! Truth to Power, man!”
— Maggie (@TheBigMRanch) January 6, 2019
She left out the part where she lied about it to get a big paycheck.
— Bill Ferris (@cwferris) January 5, 2019
Warren is not crazy; ;she is dishonest. Claiming to be an Indian to claim affirmative action benefits was fraud.
— Minka (@Minka51150356) January 6, 2019
@SenWarren lives in a $5.4 million dollar mansion, claimed to be Native American status to score a Harvard position paying $350k to teach 1 class, where she lectures us that the “system” is rigged to benefit the rich. Let that sink in
— Ronny Simpson (@Rangerthat1125) January 6, 2019
You are corrupt. Pay back all funds you received falsly claiming Native American status. You occupied a position meant for an actual Native American. An actual Native American would Never be so dishonest. Shame!!!
— k (@shashook17) January 6, 2019
— Cheryl Argenziano (@CherylArgenzia2) January 6, 2019
@SenWarren If you call yourself a Native American for years to appropriate their culture or steal their benefits given to them in compensation for terrible treatment, and you take a DNA test that proves you were never an Indian, you really are a POS. #MAGA #Qanon
— GreenLeafPublishers.com ??✝️???⏰Q???? (@greenleafpub) January 6, 2019
But no, no, no @ the latter tweeter, because remember, according to Warren, the president is the real “POS.” Why? Because she said so or something.
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