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Internet adultery hack missed THESE folks by a country mile; can you guess why?

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While last week’s release of registered users’ profiles from the adultery website Ashley Madison exposed cheating spouses nationwide, the hack left people in three ZIP codes unscathed.

Now, before assuming these three communities are beacons of light in which you can find loyal spouses in the darkness of unfaithful partners, there is good reason for their lack of representation in the scandal.

They have incredibly small populations and — this is a biggie — they have almost no Internet.

As Gawker’s Gabrielle Bluestone reported, they are:

Nikolai, Alaska: 99691 – Population: 94 as of the 2010 U.S. Census.

Perryville, Alaska: 99648 — Population: 113 as of the 2010 U.S. Census.

Polvadera, New Mexico: 87828 — Population: 269 as of the 2010 U.S. Census.

“There’s maybe roughly 10 households that have Internet,” Perryville’s Dana Phillips told Gawker.

Respondents in the other two towns shared similar sentiments with Gawker, telling the website their towns consisted of mostly older people who simply don’t have access to the web.

But the best response came from Nikolai emergency firefighter Nancy Vanderpool, who was in a hurry to get off the phone with Bluestone.

“I don’t know how you got my number, but I need to free up this phone because I have customers waiting to use the credit card,” she said. “And I really don’t have the time to be talking with you right now about cheating on spouses, or whatever, gawkers.”

Carmine Sabia

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