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Michelle Obama makes student loans sound like a Hawaiian vacation

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A college education is a piece of cake, if you can get someone else to pay for it.

“All you have to do to access that aid is fill out this one little form. It’s so simple,” first lady Michelle Obama told students during a visit to a suburban high school on Wednesday, according to CNS News. “Almost everyone is eligible for some form of financial aid.”

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Photo: Fox News

That’s true enough. Almost everyone is eligible for financial aid, except it’s mostly student loans — not outright grants — that can help buy a degree in anything from mechanical or computer engineering to transgender-pre-colonial-puppetry studies. And almost everyone can go into the student-loan debt to pay for it.

Obviously, most college majors produce careers that end up paying for the loans (hint, the safest generally have the word “business” or “engineering” in them). Some don’t (any reference to “gender” is generally a tipoff) and produce graduates who have to find some non-profitable way to Occupy their time.

Regardless of what they study or whether they get a job with it, though, everyone is also eligible to pay back that money, which is why student-loan debt is more than $1 trillion in this country now — with about half of it in danger of never being repaid because a lot of the the people who owe it can’t make a living.

This is the kind of thing the Obamas know something about, since they didn’t manage to pay off their student-loan debts until Barack started making it big in government work with his election to the U.S. Senate in 2004. But that didn’t come up Wednesday, when Michelle Obama was pushing the Free Application for Federal Student Aid – heck, even that name sounds great.

“It can help you access the thousands of dollars to help you and your family pay for college,” Obama told the kids.

“So that’s why I’m here. And that’s my message for you and for students all across the country: Fill out those forms. Fill them out! (Laughter.) Don’t leave money on the table. Parents, don’t leave money on the table. Fill out the form.”

Don’t leave money on the table!

When millions of adults signed legal contracts to buy houses with money they couldn’t afford to pay back, Democrats screamed about “predatory lenders.” When the first lady visits high school kids she pitches “everyone is eligible” to take on debt that can be crushing, that can be literally lifelong, and cannot by law be discharged through bankruptcy.

“You don’t have to be the valedictorian. You don’t have to major in a certain subject. You don’t even have to be at the very bottom of the income ladder to receive the money,” Obama told the kids.

You just might end up at the bottom of the income ladder, though, without a job to pay all that debt you’re carrying. Of course, you won’t have to get one now, thanks to the Obamas. You’ll have health insurance.

 

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