Why I’m a social conservative

Anyone who knows me longer than five minutes realizes that, although I’m a fiscal conservative to the core, I tend keep my opinion on social issues to myself. I consider them personal, and no one’s business but my own. Today, however, I’ve decided to let loose.

On abortion:
I’m a pro-life kinda guy. I’m not saying abortion should be outlawed under all circumstances, but as it’s used today – as an alternative form of birth control — it’s immoral and should be banned. “Abortion: something within us is dying” isn’t just a catchy pro-life slogan. It’s a sobering observation of our deteriorating moral fiber. If groups like Planned Parenthood truly want to be a positive influence on society, I suggest they begin by practicing “informed consent” with their patients. Give them the information necessary to make an informed decision. They could, for example, show the life growing within the womb, and point out their rudimentary eyes and beating heart. They should inform them that this life already has an identifying DNA and set of fingerprints. Finally, they should emphasize adoption as an option.

“Roe v. Wade” was less a legal opinion than it was a societal statement. It was based solely on the perceived denial of a woman’s “right to privacy.” The U.S. Constitution, including its 27 amendments, contains 7,818 words, and “privacy” isn’t one of them. At best, abortion should be a matter of state concern — not federal involvement.

On gay marriage:
Gay marriage isn’t a legal problem – it’s a definitional one. In order to make gay marriage possible, one would have to change the definition of “marriage,” not modify the law. Marriage is the union of one man and one woman for the purpose of procreation. Period. If two people of the same sex want to have a “civil union,” so be it. Just don’t call it marriage.

On animal rights:
I love animals. I think they’re cute, hilarious, heartwarming and cuddly. Anyone who mistreats an animal should receive the same punishment he inflicted upon the poor critter.

But I also realize they’re animals. I believe animals were placed on Earth to serve humankind — as companions, beasts of burden and as food. I have nothing against vegans if that’s your “thing.” Just don’t try to make it my “thing.” Until recently, I thought that PETA stood for “People Eating Tasty Animals.”

There you have it, my personal social philosophy. If you agree, I applaud your wisdom. If you disagree, let me know, and I’ll point out the flaw in your reasoning.

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